A Little Reminder...

Hey Guys,

For those of you that follow me on Twitter, you'll already have seen a little snippet of this but a couple of weeks ago I broke my ink virginity...

Tattoos had never really interested me, I had often thought that they would look nice on certain people..I just wasn't one of those people : / However, after seeing the temporary tattoos of the question mark, featured on BBC3's Extreme OCD Camp series, I started to seriously consider something similar. I liked the thought of having a little reminder, to challenge the OCD when I was really struggling or having a difficult moment.

After some thought I realised that OCD is all about the 'What if's?'. What if I hurt someone whilst I'm out? What if I trod in dog feaces whilst walking home and go blind? What if I one day act on my intrusive thoughts? WHAT IF WHAT IF WHAT IF...you get the gist! So that's what I decided on, to have 'What if...' written on the inside of my left wrist. That way it's somewhere rather concealed, I can even cover with a watch or bangle should I need to. However, it's accessible enough to notice when say, I'm having a frantic hand washing session, or picking up my cousins baby. It's there, FOREVER.

That was probably the only reason I was hesitant, the forever-ness of a tattoo. But I believe that acceptance is a huge part of OCD. Not accepting the thoughts as such, because let's face it, they're horrific at the best of times. But more of an acceptance of thoughts in general, accepting that they are JUST thoughts, nothing more. I think it's also about accepting yourself for who you are, OCD has been a part of my life for as long as I can remember and although I continue to fight it in every single way, every day, I have come to accept it to some extent. Whilst I dream of a life devoid of OCD, I also understand that it's about living my life the best way I can, it's about managing.

So yes, hopefully this little etching will continue to encourage me to challenge the thoughts and live my life in a way consistent with MY goals and values, not the OCD's.

Thanks for reading.

Becca xoxo